Self-esteem is your reading of yourself. Everyone has an inbuilt score card wherein they give themselves points on their self-assessment. It’s a good system but not infallible. Our assessment is prone to influences from society. In fact we tend to judge ourselves more according to what the others think of us than what we actually think of ourselves. More often than we find ourselves in a situation where we begin to feel dejected.
Being over-critical of ourselves, we lower our self-worth. This results in low self-esteem. However, all is not lost. Improving our self-esteem is in our capable hands. After all we know what we have to improve upon – consciously or sub-consciously!
Our first step is to identify what we should perfect – external appearance, opinions, thinking, attitude or whatever else we want. Take a pen and paper and list out this inventory. When it is in front of you in black and white you will find it easier to act upon it.
Secondly, make it habit to think positively. Initially this will seem like an uphill task but as you get into the habit, it will come automatically. When you think positive, you exude self-confidence that all around you will find hard to miss. Then of course you have to be decisive. Take firm and sensible decisions and stand by them no matter what.
Make sure to look for Part 2 of Ways To Improve Self Esteem.
This might be hard to do at first, because you might feel guilty about taking time for yourself. Perhaps you even feel a bit greedy or selfish because you want to do nice things for yourself. Ignore all of that! Do those things anyway. As time passes and you continue to do these things, you’ll begin to be more comfortable in spending time just on you.
2) Treat yourself well physically, too. Exercise, eat right, and get enough rest. If you have low self-esteem, it’s likely that you’ve neglected your own self-care, so that you end up tired and even sick. Don’t do that. You deserve the same care and attention you would give someone else, even if you’re not quite sure you deserve it just yet.
3) Give yourself a treat. Of course, you need to take care of yourself mentally and physically, and you need to have fun on a regular basis. The next thing you should do is to treat yourself. Do this regularly; these “treats” don’t have to be expensive. They just have to be something that you’ll truly enjoy and that will make you feel special. Buy yourself a new journal or outfit, have lunch out with a good friend, or take in a movie you’ve wanted to see. Doing this can elevate your mood and make you feel like you’re basking in praise.
These things may seem small, but small things matter too, sometimes more than big ones. As time goes on and you continue to nurture yourself in these ways, you can begin to greatly improve how you feel about yourself and well on the way to overcoming low self esteem. And in fact, that’s the whole point.
How’s it going with stopping your abusive self talk? This may take you some time to do, but you’ll progress well if you just stay with it. Today, I have some ideas on how you can learn to treat yourself more kindly. Yesterday, I asked you how you would treat someone you cared about. You would probably not abuse them, certainly, but you might even do something nice for them.
Maybe you tell them you care about them, or would buy them something they want from time to time. In general, it’s likely that you would encourage them both verbally and through your actions, and you would do what you could and to make sure they knew they were loved and cared for.
It’s time you did this for yourself, too. Here are three simple self esteem tips you can do to start:
1) Make sure to spend time doing things you enjoy. If you have low self-esteem, often you don’t do things you want to simply because you’re either too busy trying to please others and don’t have time, or because you haven’t paid attention to what you really want to do, to what will make you relax and have fun.
From this point on, start making time to do things you love, such as pursuing creative endeavors, socializing with friends and family, reading books you’ve always wanted to, watching a favorite movie, spend time on journaling hopes and dreams, or taking part in hobbies you enjoy. What you do doesn’t really matter, except that you have to have fun and you actually have to do it and you will be on the important path to overcoming low self esteem.
